STUMPED!

The World's Funniest Cricket Quotes

By Charlie Croker

160x120mm • 160pp • £5.99 • PLC • ISBN 978-1-906051-02-0 • June 2008

A great deal of credit must go to cricket radio announcers. Whilst most sports commentators have at best a couple of hours to fill, cricket announcers have up to eight hours to spend keeping us informed and entertained. It is no wonder that they come out with the occasional howler or downright gaffe. The master of these was, of course, Brian Johnston.

In one famous incident during a Test match at the Oval, Jonathan Agnew suggested that Ian Botham was out because he had failed to "get his leg over". Johnston carried on commentating (and giggling) for 30 seconds before finally dissolving into helpless laughter. All over Britain drivers listening to Test Match Special were forced to pull over as this incident made it practically impossible to drive safely.

Among Johnston’s other gaffes was, “There's Neil Harvey standing at leg slip with his legs wide apart, waiting for a tickle” - when Neil Harvey was representing Australia at the Headingley Test in 1961. The oft-cited quote - “The bowler's Holding, the batsman's Willey” - allegedly occurred when Michael Holding of the West Indies was bowling to Peter Willey of England in a Test match at the Oval in 1976.

This book is packed with funny cricket quotes dedicated to cricket people the world over. It’s a sport that doesn’t take itself too seriously and is all the better for that.

"The Port Elizabeth ground is more of a circle than an oval.
It's long and square"
Trevor Bailey

"That slow motion replay doesn't show how fast the ball was travelling”
Richie Benaud

“Pakistan is the sort of place every man should send his mother-in-law, for a month, with all expenses paid”
Ian Botham

"What a magnificent shot! No, he's out”
Tony Greig

"One ball left”
Brian JohnsTon
as Glenn Turner resumed batting after being hit in an intimate place

"I'm not one to blame anyone, but it was definitely Viv Richards's fault”
Fred Trueman