SHITE EXCUSES

FIND THE EXCUSE THEY HAVEN’T HEARD BEFORE

By Moira la Chame

ISBN 1-905102-15-1
£2.99, PB

A collection of the strangest and weirdest excuses ever given to employers, spouses, dentists, doctors, teachers - in fact, anybody.

So, ‘phone in and tell your boss you’ve been diagnosed with chronic fatigue syndrome over the weekend and don’t have the energy to get out of bed and come to work. Then read this instead!

Very sorry can’t come.
Lie follows by post.
Telegram sent by Lord Charles Beresford to the Prince of Wales after an eleventh-hour summons to dine.

Good taste is the excuse I’ve always given for leading such a bad life.
Oscar Wilde